Your Threats and Your Offer of Peace

I come now to your epilogue, that is, to the abuse you pour on me, in which you urge me to repent and threaten me with destruction unless I am converted; that is, unless I keep silent under your accusations. And this scandal, you say, will fall back on my own head, because it is I who by replying have provoked you into the madness of writing, though you are a man of the utmost gentleness and of a meekness worthy of Moses. You declare that you know of crimes which I confessed to you alone when you were my most intimate friend, and that you will bring them before the public; that I will be painted in my true colors; and that I ought to remember that I am lying at your feet, or else you might cut off my head with the sword of your mouth. And after many such things, in which you toss yourself about like a madman, you draw yourself up and say that you want peace, but still with the hint that I am to keep quiet in future: that is, that I am not to write against the heretics, nor answer any accusation you make. If I do this, I will be your good brother and colleague, a most eloquent person, and your friend and companion; and, what is more, you will pronounce all the translations I have made from Origen orthodox. But if I utter a word or move a step, I will at once be unsound and a heretic, unworthy of any connection with you. This is how you trumpet my praises; this is how you urge me to peace. You do not allow me the freedom even of a groan or a tear in my grief. [a]